Ho, Hum.

Feeling very glum today, which is in no small part due to the rain. May had better be a freaking florists' convention.

I'm trying to come to terms with waiting, since I'm starting to understand that the universe wants to make sure I really marinate in it.

Here's the update on Eva's progress with walking: she's been taking steps since March 27th (yay!), but is completely uninterested in trying it unless I start her off. She'll walk holding my hand, and will take a few steps once I drop it, but that's all she wants to do right now. I know that she will walk, and it is a source of comfort to know that she can walk, but her therapist is a bit perplexed about why she hasn't just "taken off" like many kids do once they get a hit of being ambulatory. I'm working on not worrying about it and deciding that in this, as in all things, she's just mellow. She's so much like her father in that respect, and it's endearing. I, however, am impatient like Mt. Vesuvius, and I just want to get on with the erupting already.

Which brings us right round, baby, right round to the other side of the (broken) record: the job thing. There's been no word at all on the high school job in VA for which he interviewed in February. We were told to expect word about a month ago, so suffice it to say that ship has sailed without so much as a "by your leave." Please, dear reader: if you're ever in a position to interview multiple candidates, and you find your one true love and hire him or her, please do at least TELL the other folks "thanks, but no thanks." Rudeness was never really a part of this job search before, but I'd say that no contact AT ALL with someone who missed work and drove eight hours to be interviewed at 7:00 am is a pretty shitty thing. Extremely shitty, even, but why quibble with amounts once your hands are dirty?

And so it continues. Applications are sought out, filled out, and sent out. Wash, rinse, repeat. I'm working on being OK with being here indefinitely, and to that end have started putting projects in the works that I wanted for my "real" life, but never started here because we were supposed to be moving-- things like cleaning out the basement (I'll just do it when we pack), finding some kind of permanent toy storage solution (clothes baskets are fine because we're just going to be moving soon, anyway, and I'll get something to match the new place), organizing and putting away all the stuff from the baby stages Eva's outgrown (we'll be packing soon and I'll do it then) and rearranging furniture to create more of a play area (you get the idea). I'm hoping to try and find some time when my mother can come out to watch Eva while I do some of this. We'll see. I'd like to be able to have her come here without my father coming, too (a can of worms I don't need to deal with right now), but sometimes her tether is short.

But back to the waiting. I'm busting out the Thich Naht Hahn, since nobody's better at helping me remember the beauty in every day no matter what the extenuating circumstances. Furthermore, it pays to look around me at my healthy family, beautiful friends, and cute side yard and remember that things could (ever and always) be so much worse. In the scope of things that could be wrong, but aren't, I'm sitting at the banquet table complaining about the appetizers.

I'm fairly certain that I won't grow old here on P Street, and that's what I need to focus on. In the meantime, I'm so curious about what all this waiting is grooming me for. A future in photographing elusive wildlife? The eventual discovery of Atlantis? Snow's comeback tour?

Only time will tell.